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"A Warrior's Praise for The Lawn Mower 4.0 from MANSCAPED"

by Kyllian Wildebeast at Absurdophile

My raiding party, far and wide have all heard my cry

To find a trimmer worthy of an Orcish warrior's thighs!

We searched high and low to no avail 'til I stumbled on The Lawn Mower 4.0 from MANSCAPED, the ultimate manly machine for me in between!

It has wireless charging, superb grooming guards sizes 1 through 4 that lend it worth

Plus its waterproof measures mean a closer cut than ever before on all those cursed hairs from here until the very North

No matter how you choose or where you search throughout our land

The MANSCAPED Electric Groin Hair Trimmer is the reason my grace with every woman knows no known stand!

From cheeky chaps to coddled crops there’s nothing this Trimmer won't tame

For coiffure below waist line--the electric reach is just insane!

With SkinSafe™ Ceramic Blades and rust proof shears so sharp they glide right through your hair like silk - do not worry about cuts nor their fear!

Your groin will thank you with every stroke of this wonderful tool so rejoice now we ought – go forth wearing that smile so bold !

So come along, join us wash-aways, show what strength really means: power up The Lawn Mower 4.0 from MANSCAPED and enjoy being clean!!

Check it out!

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